Monday, May 25, 2009

My kind of sushi...

Sushi? Kinda! Chocolate rolls, angel food cake shrimp things, cream cheese wasabi and apricot ginger...


I made these for girls night on Friday night. I told my friends I was making a surprise desert. One of my friends, Lauren, who has a propensity of not hiding her feelings in anyway and an equal propensity for her love of desert was pissed when I brought these out. Her face dropped and she started telling me "I hate sushi. I don't think it's funny that you think sushi is desert. Is this is a joke? You said desert!"
I took that as a compliment for how good they looked. The massive amounts of wine involved also helped the realism.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Qutting your job: a story in metaphore

We need to talk.
I'm not sure I'm happy here - I'm pretty sure you feel the same way. I'm not saying I'm leaving but I think you should know that I'm not happy.

You're too sensitive. You're too naive to handle this. That's why you're backing out. I don't want you to go. And're nothing with out me. I'm all you've got.
I'll think about it.
I've thought about it. I've got to get out now before we're too entrenched together. We're already getting caught up here and I know we're not right for each other. We aren't good for each other. It's best to do this now. You'll see.

I see. And I agree. I want you to stay but if you aren't getting what you need then go. Is there someone else?
No one else.
What are you going to do? Are you sure there is no one else?
I don't know what I'm gonna do, but I'll be fine - don't worry about me.

Now I've been doing the thinking. I want you to know that its totally fine that you're leaving but I need to say a few things - I'm hurt.
It's not like this is easy.
I'm disappointed.
Things didn't work out - it happens. I'm ending it while we're still fresh enough to get out unscathed.
I invested a lot into you.
But why? I didn't know you were doing that. I would have told you not moved too fast.
You made promises to me.
We both made promises to each other.
You said I was what you wanted.
You were what I thought I wanted.
Exactly. You don't know anything. What are you going to do without me?
I know what I want now.
Is there someone else?
There's someone else.
Who is she?
yes. there is someone else. But thats not why I'm leaving. I'd leave even if there wasn't.

Go, and be with her. I think you'll be perfect together. She's desperate. I totally get why you want to go to her. She's desperate. But can you stay with me? You with her but can be with me? I'd be ok with that. She's the desperate one so you can call the shots with her.
I, um, well...
Great. Then that's what we'll do. And when you've had enough of her you can come crawling back here to me. I'll be here. Disappointed and hurt but you'll see. You don't know anything. Great.

...To be continued...

Friday, May 22, 2009

my mom would be so proud...

people like me...they really really like me...

I should probably be embarrassed but I'm not. I almost started crying I was laughing so hard when I told people about it yesterday...

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

easily one of the best headlines I've ever read

Police: 'Lohan's House Was Just Messy, Not Ransacked'

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

blacked out again

Driving home tonight we drive past a movie theater and I notice the movies that are playing:

Me: Isn't it weird that I Love You, Man is still playing but Duplicity isn't? They opened on the same day.
Jeff: Probably because I Love You, Man was a better movie.
Me: Yeah, I heard Duplicity was pretty forgettable.
Jeff: Sarah, we saw that movie.
Me: Well...I guess that proves my point.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Watch the f-bomb get dropped quite a lot for new good reason

Can we leave ms. California the fuck alone?

seriously. She said something really stupid. I don't agree with her at all but here is the thing about our country...she's totally aloud to think what she thinks - and shes aloud to say it out loud.

Yeah, she should really stop her talk show circuit - or at least form a slightly more informed opinion about the differences between legal unions and religious marriages - but really, lets all shut up about her. So what, she posed nude, all you media outlets are looking like douche bags. It actually reminds me of what would happen in our sorority in college - one girl would do something kind of fucked up, but usually not anymore fucked up then the rest of her group - but for some reason the collective conscious of the group would suddenly decide that this person had to be kicked out, and had to pay.
It was always completely organic and always got way out of hands. See: mean, public facebook groups, getting alumni parents involved, getting the girls kicked out of the sorority, completely alienating them from their core support groups.
(I'm not even talking about one single incident is the worst part)

She got a boob job - and the state of California ratted her out? Even though the state of California paid for it? Thats like going "Annie did cocaine! I know she did! I gave it to her! What an awful person!"

In conclusion - media outlets, stop being such gigantic tools. This is not worthy of our time.
Beauty Queen - You should shut the hell up too. You're a fucking beauty queen. And you're not very smart.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Hi, I'm a PC

Know that Mac/PC commercial where PC goes into the future using his time machine to see if they ever figure out the glitches and stuff?

Doesn't the fact that he has a freakin' time machine make him far superior in his technological advances than like, itunes or something? I don't know, it's worth looking over those minor glitches to me. This is the kind of impossible anomaly that makes computerized robots explode*.

I'm a PC and I make computerized robots explode.

*I can only assume, based on these ads, that John Hodgkin's and Justin Long are computerized robots.