Whats in a name?

I vowed to myself and my new husband that I would not get upset nor correct anyone who incorrectly referred to me by his last name. No, if someone called me Sarah Jones I wouldn't say anything unless it was necessary. It doesn't really bother me, it doesn't happen often and its usually by the well intentioned, all though uninformed, that I, for whatever reason, didn't change my last name to his.

What does offend me, and I actually mean offend, is getting letters and packages - or referred to in any way - as "Mrs. Jeffrey Jones". What the fuck. I know I didn't personally contribute to woman's lib or anything, but I'm pretty sure we're passed the point in time where my value is demonstrated on whether or not I'm married and who I'm married too. Of course this helps to define me, but as much as it helps to define Jeff.

One time a box of all of my dad's elementary school memorabilia was brought out and I loved going through it but was completely perplexed that every report card and letter home was signed by "Mrs. James Howell". When I asked my mema about this, she couldn't give me a satisfactory answer. Something about how it's your husbands importance that is taken on. And so I pressed about why she was even aloud to sign it at all then it just kinda circled around because, you know, that's just how it is.

My point? Until we receive a letter addressed to "Mrs. and Mr. Sarah Howell" I will probably want to punch my fist through the wall every time I see that antiquated label.

And in other news, we got home from Europe late last night and I'll be storytelling soon.

He'd never survive in the real world

Two cop cars are sitting outside of our apartment right now.

Jeff: I just bought pot from the cop.

Me: Oh yeah? How'd that work out?

Jeff: I walked up to one of them and I was like "Do you sell pot?" and he said "no, I arrest people who sell pot". Then I walked up to the other cop and said "Do you sell pot?" and he said "yes" so I said "I'll take three"

Me: Three what?

Jeff: Three marijuana

Me: dumb founded

Jeff: Marijuana is plural for marijuana, like geese.

Me: Geese is plural for goose...and anyways, what?

We did

When we were planning our wedding, we just wanted it to be the most fun wedding of all time. Oh, and also be beautiful. That's not too much to ask, is it?

Mustaches and flip flops for all, mad libs and crosswords in the program, a photo booth, dancing, a candy buffet and an all around amazing time.

Apparently not!

I'm home...

but bare with me, I'm still trying to unpack -
- I've had a very long 2 weeks...

Civic Duty - Ur Doin It Right

"I Voted" stickers. Falls hottest accessories.

I have a PhD in horribleness

I was in my closet a few minutes ago picking out clothes to wear tonight and the millisecond I stepped out of the closet Jeff nailed me repeatedly with a marshmallow gun.

Thats right. A gun that shoots mini marshmallows using air pressure...I got about 50 in my face.

Jeff dropped to him knees, laughing so hard he was literally in tears and in between his tears cried out "OH MY GOD! THIS IS SO AWESOME!!"

Halloween is the greatest holiday ever.

*I will post pictures after Halloween that will make the subject line and the need for a marshmallow pellet gun make more sense. Just laugh about the fact that we've been in a marshmallow war for a few hours.

Jeff and Sarah - k.i.t.

Jeff and I have been though so much together. Maybe I'm being a bit sentimental, but I just wanted to look back on some important times in our lives.

Shortly after we met. I had a steady with Donny Perkins but Jeff asked my folks if he could take me to the ice cream social. I didn't like Donny too much anyway and Jeff brought me a swell corsage that night.

Then things started changing, the whole air smelled different. Women started having options and voicing opinions, like how much dreamier her boyfriend looked with his coif instead of a buzz cut and why the bouffant was much more hip and with it then the wave. Also, we started saying "hip" and "with it". Yep, things were different all right.

And then we helped fight adversity. Can ya dig it? We were too fly to not be an interracial couple.

And then humidity came by and we lost all the fighting power in our mighty hair do's. And we started smokin' a lot of pot and couldn't be bothered with picks and hairspray, anyways. Chill out, man. We gotta like, love mother earth and stuff.

BUT THEN! IT WAS THE 80'S AND WE STOPPED SMOKING POT AND STARTED DOING COKE! SNORTING COKE! LOTS OR RADICAL PARTIES, TOO! MOTHER EARTH IS A NERD!! AND THEN LOOK! THEN WE COULD BE BOTHERED WITH PICKS AND HAIR SPRAY, BRO HEEM!! WE COULDN'T GET ENOUGH! IT COULDN'T BE HIGH ENOUGH, OR CRUNCHY ENOUGH!! WE WERE TOTALLY TUBULAR!!!

and then we went to rehab for like an entire decade. We had to kick it, and it was hard.

Jeff went back to the gonja, bro. But I was too worried about Y2K and the subtle highlights and the layers that framed my face to worry about that.

It's amazing how far we've come.

Let's Cause a Scene

Jeff and I met slightly over three years ago, as many of you know, at a concert in Jacksonville.

The band was The Format and they were phenomenal, but other wise not relative to the story.

What is relative is that at this tiny venue in Little Five Points called Fuel Coffee House, the AC was broken, the concert was sold out and it was July in Florida.

As I balanced in the passage way between the back of the joint where The Format was playing and the front where the front door was open, gasping for fresh air, I met him. This quite man who reserves his words for the people he knows well approached me. Talked to me. Had to talk to me. Had to know me.

"Who was that person?" I would ask him later on, once I found out how shy he was to strangers. "Where did the guy who talked to me at the concert come from?"

"I'm not sure" he told me "but I had to know you"

We were never strangers.

Last year The Format broke up, sad, I know. But true.



And then our friend Shannon came to Charleston a few weeks ago.


Shannon was originally just Jeff's friend, but that's only because I didn't know her yet. Shannon introduced Jeff to The Format. Shannon told Jeff to get off his butt that hot night in July and stop moping over some girl and go have a good time. Shannon is a good friend, I tell you.

When she came to visit a few weeks ago she brought us our wedding present from her.

"I tried contacting the band, but I only got an e-mail back from the person who runs the website" she told us "I asked if she could get a hold of Nate and Sam (the 2 main members of the format) and have them write you guys a note, or something. She said she couldn't. But she said she had some old poster lying around that was signed by them. I aimed high and got pretty low. I hope you don't mind"


(the poster, in all of it's awesome, framed glory, signed, however generically, by Nate and Sam)

Just the act of attempting to contact the band and get something for us is going to be hard to beat by anyone. But the poster is great. We love it.

And it may not be personally signed for us...but it's more special then Shannon realized. It's the poster from the show we met at.

I'd like to try this new sport...I believe it's called "Yogging" I think the J is silent...

Jeff has a new website for his running team. They call themselves AKap, Awesome Kick Ass Performance Training Team.

Are you a runner? Do you wish you were a runner? Do you want to be a better runner no matter what level you're at?
Jeff would LOVE to make you a comprehensive training schedule...he's really good at perfecting a running regimen that is perfect for you, your skill level and your time commitment.


Just head on over to his website and shoot him an e-mail!



http://www.akaptrainingteam.com/


some akap members at a 5k in Charleston...Jeff (the one in the middle who isn't me ((note the one in the middle without boobs if you still need help)) won this race in 16:53, Jason (orange shorts) ran 19:28, Thomas (silver shorts) ran 27:14 and I (the one with boobs) finished the race...last...(ok, so there was like 30 people in the whole race but still, I finished and my point is, Jeff can help any person at any level, holler at him)

Things I Love Thursday, Jeff edition

1) He likes to do the dishes.

2) When he goes out of town, he hides notes for me - in the fridge, the shower, drawers...this one was in plane sight on his side of the bed when I got home yesterday.

3) He makes up songs about whatever it is that hes doing, all the time. Essentially narrating his life in song. Which is ironic because he claims he doesn't "get" musicals. *Since I don't have a picture of him singing I opted instead for an adorable picture of him as a boy

4) He loves me and he's going to marry me in almost 2 months!

5) When he does marry me, thanks to his sweet government job, I'll get sweet government health insurance! (Eat it, private sector!)

6) He's still so freakin' adorable I can hardly stand it.

Sarah's take on hand holding.

I find that a lot of cynical people are offended by hand holding between couples as if it is one of the most disgusting and reprehensible forms of PDA known to man.

Earlier this summer, a friend and I were laying out at the pool at her apartment complex. We were the only people at the pool until this college-age couple showed up, got in the pool as close to us as could be and while the guy sat on the ledge (facing us) his girlfriend sat on his lap (also facing us) and began grinding. For as long as we were at the pool. Now that is offensive public displays of affection.

I love holding Jeff's hand. I grab it in ever instance that I can. And here's the kicker...it has nothing to do with anyone but Jeff and myself. I like being close to him, I like feeling his skin on mine, I genuinely love being around my soon to be husband. I mean, can you believe it? It's not a declaration to others around me that he belongs to me, or that I'm accounted for, or that we're so happy and you're so not. It has as much to do with you as the shirt I put on before I leave the house.

Holding hands is an extremely intimate interchange between two people. Parents hold their children's hands, lovers grasp, friends hold hands. But the human touch is personal, delicate. Like staring into someones eyes - you might want to turn away because it is too personal. To be touched is intense, to be touched and held onto - not knowing when you'll be let go - that requires you to let that person in.

But it's not vulgar, it doesn't make me less interesting and it still has nothing to do with you.

Engagement Photos

Taken by one of Jeff's best friends/grooms man, Jason Pratt. http://www.jasondpratt.com/

blacked out again

Driving home tonight we drive past a movie theater and I notice the movies that are playing:

Me: Isn't it weird that I Love You, Man is still playing but Duplicity isn't? They opened on the same day.
Jeff: Probably because I Love You, Man was a better movie.
Me: Yeah, I heard Duplicity was pretty forgettable.
Jeff: Sarah, we saw that movie.
Me: Well...I guess that proves my point.

Why I'll Kill Him Reason # 58

Listening to the radio in the car home last night, the DJ* told us a little story about how couples that have pet names for each other have a stronger feelings, a healthier relationship and just generally a tighter bond.

"Yes!" I said "Thats why I call you Sweetums!"

"And thats exactly why I call you Sarah."


*It was totally the John Tesh Show



PS, I hope people understand that I find Jeffs jack-assery hilarious and know he's just being funny - which is obviously why I share them here.

Dear Liver, I'm sorry.

Portrait of an engagement party:


Portraits of the bar after the engagement party:

Don't stop believing.

I'm sorry, I know that's a strange way to tell you that I know we belong

Several years ago my mema died after a long struggle with emphysema. My papa had cared for her dearly during those very hard last years. When she died it was too hard for him to be in the house that reminded him so much of her pain, so he built himself a much smaller version of the house they lived in just a few lots down on the same street.
Now my papa is in his final moments and has been moved from his house into a nursing home. My parents were in Georgia this past week caring for him when my mom decided to go over to his house and try to find some things that belonged to my mema that I might be able to wear in the wedding.
As she started opening each drawer in my papas bedroom, hoping to find her mother-in-laws things stashed somewhere amongst his she realized that half of the dresser, the closet, the clothing bureau's, were still dedicated to my mema. Her clothes folded up neatly inside.
"If she came back", my mother said "it would be as if she never left. She wouldn't have to look for a thing".

My mom sat on the floor of my papa's bedroom and cried like a little baby for thirty minutes before she finally opened the bottom drawer and found a box with three pair of her fanciest gloves from her youth and a rhinestone choker that matches my dress perfectly.

Why it won't take long before I kill him Reason 83, or, How I met my match in witty smart assyness...

Jeff: Lets live in a trailer. Pre Fontaine lived in a trailer, so if I lived in a trailer I'd probably be able to run faster.

Sarah: Just like you're growing a beard because all of the fastest runners had beards so that must make you run faster?

Jeff: Thats a fact.

Sarah: Would you be faster if my boobs were bigger?

Jeff: No, but I'd be a lot happier.

It's a good thing you can run fast, so you can get away before I kick you in your balls and wipe that grin off your face...

After we stopped laughing long enough to catch our breaths, Jeff said "I really want you to put this in your blog, but people are gonna start thinking I'm an ass hole."

done and done!

Things that help

Calling your best friend and telling her you need her to come over, and with out the slightest hesitation she agrees.

Her dropping everything to come over and then, knowing you so well, can tell by the look on your face that you just want her to sit next to you for a long while until you feel like talking.

Once you finally realize that you want to talk and you want to leave the house, the first order of business must be showering - so she sits in the bathroom and talks to you while you shower.

sacrificing her entire day to stay your my side.

Your fiance giving you sound advice by singing songs from a musical.

oh yeah, and watching veronica mars and playing rock band with great great friends.

thank you.

Why it won't take long before I kill him Reason 697

Reading from a book in which they give an astrological prediction for every single birthday-

"Hey! Jeff! It says that people born on January 2nd are best suited for love with a cancer! I'm a cancer!"
"Yes you are. You'll always be the cancer of my life."

Why I love him Reason 4356

While in the middle of a very severe breakdown the other day, Jeff suggested this comforting advice with both sincerity and seriousness-

"Why don't you go to the mall and sit on Santas lap? It would help, I'm sure."

Thanks for continually gluing me back together.